I’m in a room, an adobe room, all alone and lying on a bed. An oil lamp illuminates parts of the otherwise dark room. I’m about to die. My vision becomes blurry. I’m going to die alone. I suddenly see someone entering the room, but I’ve already started to leave my body. I’m now fully separated, hanging in what looks something like outer space…
I’m walking through the streets now. I feel like some sort of god, as if I have an indescribable measure of self-confidence and power. I’m in Alexandria during the ancient times of Egypt. The people I meet on the streets salute me in gestures of great respect. After all, why wouldn’t they? A divine, godlike being is walking down the street. I’m not exaggerating: I really mean it. This is the first time I’ve incarnated on this planet, yet I’ve visited this place countless times before. I know life on Earth all too well. I was even recorded in history as a respected deity. Many temples were built in my name, and tourists from all over the world visit what remains of them. They see me all around, and some tattoo my symbols onto their bodies. Such a being was I, but now I’ve decided to come down to earth once again. But why you ask? It’s because I’ve fallen for a mortal woman and didn’t want to just watch her distantly from another dimension—I wanted to live with her, embrace her, hold her tight, breathe her scent, and make love to her night after night. I’ve truly fallen for her, an immortal love for a mortal being, yet if I want to live this love, there is only one way the universe permits it: I had to abandon both my immortality and divine identity. I had to come down to earth and become like every other mortal. And you know what? I did it! The other celestial beings respected me for making such a sacrifice, because none of them dared go to such extents and give up everything that is heavenly about them. I did it, though, and I travelled back in time just to live in her world…
* * *
I’m strolling down the streets of Alexandria right now. I forgot long ago who I used to be, but still the energy of that heavenly spirit radiates through me. The Egyptians sense this familiar energy, and they step aside when they encounter me on the streets. I may not be conscious of whom I really am, but I know I’m different in some way, so I walk the streets with a great deal of self-confidence. I’m heading for the house I share with my beloved. Yes, we came into this world together, and our destinies are already intertwined with each other. We met, came to know each other, fell in love, walked hand in hand, kissed, hugged, made love, and married. Our love has already borne two beautiful fruits, with a third on the way…
* * *
I’m waiting at the door again, just as I’ve done twice before, but I feel something is amiss in there. I hear screams, so I rush into the room. My beloved is lying on the ground with her legs apart. Her eyes are dull, and a baby is crying in the arms of the midwife. Her mother and sister are also crying, but I just stare at my beloved. I move closer to her. She’s dead, gone. I go deaf, and everything becomes silent. All I can do is stare at the lifeless eyes of the woman I love. I cannot feel anything; I’m numb, but I know that this is just the lull before the storm. I bend down to kiss her. I want to bring her back to life, and I feel I can do it somehow. A great power awakens within me, and I believe I can resurrect her—I can do this! I try, try, and try, but I fail. I just can’t do it. She’s gone, and I feel something I’ve never felt before. My heart and belly begin to burn, and how it hurts! I feel I’m no good to anyone, and then the anguish turns into anger, a destructive rage, a godlike rage, an enormous rage… My energy becomes uncontrollable. I feel someone’s presence, but I cannot even see whom it is. I feel a desire to destroy anything and everything. I then realize there’s a sickle in my hand. I don’t know how it got there, but it doesn’t matter. I use it to slice into anything and anyone in sight, combining the sickle with my destructive energy. I don’t stop—I can’t stop. I don’t know what this anguish is that I’m feeling, and I don’t know how to deal with it. It’s too much, too much to bear. My energy burns everything to the ground…
Then I find myself outside, looking at my collapsed house. My clothes are soaked with blood. I look at my hands, look at myself, and look around. I can’t understand what’s happened. I stand up, walk to the house, and there I see a body on the ground, then another, and another, and another… My beloved is lying on the ground with her lifeless stare. The baby lies beside her, but it’s silent now. The midwife is on the ground as well, along with my beloved’s mother and sister. And worst of all… Argh… I can’t talk about it any longer …
* * *
“Go on, tell me everything. Let it all out,” says the therapist.
It’s too hard, too damn hard. I cover my face with my hands. I’m experiencing a past event, but I’m in the therapist’s office right now. This is actually our first regression therapy together. I wanted to experience a past life that I’m already aware of, because I wondered about the details. Seeing that we can return to past lives through hypnosis, I wanted to be sure if it was real or not. Now I was actually there, experiencing it directly. I was experiencing the pain and suffering of a divine being who became mortal for his love, who went mad with the anguish and rage of losing his wife, and who slaughtered everyone in sight. But now I wasn’t so keen to see it. I was resisting, because I didn’t want to see any more…
“Carry on,” urges the therapist.
My children, both of my two children, are lying on the ground. I killed them… Argh, the guilt, anguish, rage, and anger: All these feelings wash over me. I was suffering here in İzmir because of my past life in Egypt.
Then the therapist asks the question that changes everything, “Are these your memories? Or do they belong to another entity, Hasan?” It’s a question I wouldn’t have expected in a million years. It just couldn’t happen to me, you know.
My mood suddenly changed into something like the feeling when you’re riding a carousel at full speed but it suddenly stops. I was dumbfounded. I was experiencing an enormous drama, but the therapist’s question turned everything upside down. Something inside screamed at me to stop, but I already knew the answer and had to accept it. The words rolled from my mouth: “They’re from another entity…”
The therapist asked his second question, “When did you first encounter these? Tell me the first thing that pops into your mind.”
I’m in Ankara, and I’m eight years old. My parents are fighting yet again. Actually, I’m not so sure about my age; I may be even younger, but I can’t remember. The scene is vivid, however. We’re at my aunt’s house, and my parents are fighting violently. My aunt and her husband are also there. I try to hide between two armchairs because I’m utterly ashamed. I want to lose myself between the seats.
“Did it come to you at that moment?” asked the therapist.
My energy was extremely weak. The next day, I watched a TV series about Ancient Egypt. It was called “The Dream Island.” They were trying to realize a dream about Egypt. I was very scared yet also thrilled. The entity entered my energy field at that moment and started accompanying me…
“So, let’s summon this entity now,” said the therapist as he continued to speak…
It’s not a malevolent being. It came to me to help me grow stronger, but I didn’t let it go later on. It says I’m ready now, and it has to leave. We experienced this moment for this reason, and I’m now ready to say goodbye…
* * *
I listened to the advice of the therapist and said goodbye to this admirable entity. He didn’t just accept mortality for his love—he incarnated on this planet knowing full well what would happen. All in all, he had the chance to live with his beloved for just fifteen years before the slaughter came. I looked into the eyes of this entity, this hawk-eyed entity. We were conversing telepathically, and I asked him if it was worth it or not. His eyes clouded, and for me that was as good as a “Yes, it did.” He killed eight people altogether, and after dying in that adobe room, he had to reincarnate eight more times just to clear up his karma. Yet before that, he had confined himself to a different dimension for maybe hundreds of our years, trying to pay his cosmic bail… He needed to leave and return to where he belonged, and he did it using me as the medium. He gave me strength when I collapsed, and I told his story for the whole world to hear. Isn’t that the whole point of this journey of life, after all? We’ll have wonderful stories to tell each other when we return to the source. Life is just to live, isn’t it? When we’re dead and gone, the only thing we’ll leave behind is the dash between the dates of our births and deaths, but isn’t all this adventure for this very dash?
The therapist told me some words to recite to this beautiful entity, but I didn’t even need to repeat them. We both knew that the time to depart had come when the therapist’s words merged with my feelings. Slowly he faded out, and then he was out of my energy field…
* * *
The therapist explained, “Basically, there are many people in this same situation, but they just don’t realize it. Such cases happen very frequently. We call it an ‘attachment’ situation, where an entity is attached to the energy field of an embodied entity.”
I asked the therapist if this was the same thing as “possession,” but honestly, I didn’t feel anything negative during his companionship. Possession evokes scary notions of being controlled or haunted, but I never felt anything like that from this entity.
“Those are very, very rare cases,” the therapist explained, “and you usually only see them in movies. I’ve handled more than three thousand cases so far, and only one or two of them had an element of possession. The funny thing is that we don’t even try to chase them away when we really do encounter such entities. On the contrary, it’s better if we can get them to talk to us, because they need healing, so we use therapy. Again it’s very rare, but it’s not like I’ve never witnessed a case of possession. Yours was not a negative experience, as you sensed as well. Your frequencies were similar, and it somehow entered your field to accompany you. It surfaced when things became heavier for you, since it was time to say goodbye. You’ll see the effects of this in a couple of weeks. Let’s see what difference it will make…”
* * *
It’s now three weeks since the therapy. In that session, when I bode farewell to that beautiful soul, my therapist took me back to the scene where my parents were fighting. He summoned them on a spiritual level, and there also appeared their parents, and their parents, and their parents, and so on. I’d attended many family constellation sessions before, but I had never experienced anything like this in a spiritual dimension. We worked on my immobile ancestors at the suggestion of my therapist and helped them to heal, to get their energies flowing, and to reach out and embrace me. I had seriously never experienced anything like this…
We initially set out to solve my sudden bursts of anger, and it took us somewhere I never would have imagined. In the three weeks after, I realized I wasn’t as short tempered as before. Yes, I’ve had some small, brief tantrums, but they were less intense and definitely not as frequent as before. I still need time to observe the changes, however. It’s like I was crippled and had an operation. I can walk a little now, but I’m not ready to play sports yet. Spiritual practices are much like this. You have the operation, but the results need time to show, although you can still feel the changes during the healing process…
The most prominent change is probably the relief. It’s like there’s now a huge space for me to grow into. Once the entity, which I respected greatly, left my energy field, it created an enormous space, and now I can fill this space with myself. Perhaps I wasn’t quite ready for it before, but I am now… I feel like a tiny flower growing in a huge pot. I can now feed on the energy flowing freely from my ancestors and grow.
Are you wondering what happened to that entity? I can feel him around still. He became like a spiritual teacher for me, and he assures me he’s with me whenever I need him. I sometimes feel his stare on me, and I stare back right into his eyes. We look at each other with love and gratitude.
Endless thanks to our Creator, who allowed this scenario to flourish, and to dear Horus for participating…
