For a Scorpio, sex is a little like breathing. Of course, all the signs of the Zodiac have different characteristics related to sexuality, but none of the others are directly associated with it. Everyone is drawn toward Scorpios. They are mysterious with an intense sexual appeal. It’s actually quite a strange sign, because a Scorpio also likes loneliness, does not reveal his feelings, and likes manipulating things. There’s also this jealousy thing. Because of this, many people try to keep their distance from Scorpios. People either love them or hate them, and this is normal for Scorpios because there are no shades of gray for them; everything is either black or white.

Well, as a member of this lovely sign, I’m always crazy about any matter regarding sexuality. If I want, I can easily lead a conversation toward sex within minutes. If I meet another Scorpio, I only need a day before we can talk about sex. On the other hand, I believe something is wrong with this. I’ve had many intimate relationships in my life, and they were all good, but I was never fully satisfied. Naturally, sexuality was always a great part of these relationships, but I never thought “Yes, this is it!”

While I was in Egypt during April 2012, I had a Family Constellation session with an expert called Mine Dural.  “We will have a special session with you, Hasan,” she said, “We will look at your stages of consciousness. Let’s see what we find out.” This session really changed my life. She separated my life into three stages—childhood, adolescence, and adulthood—and started our session. I realized I could not pass through the adolescence period. Mine told me this was normal because we are collectively stuck at that stage of consciousness, but I was disappointed nonetheless after being faced with this truth. Of course, the relief came afterwards. When you enter a room that has been closed for many years, you first smell the mold and moisture, but that musty odor goes away when you open the window. The fresh air comes in, and that old feeling goes out as more new air comes in. Then you finally begin cleaning and rearranging the room.

The same was true for me. After we returned from Egypt, we had more detailed sessions with Mine, and I discovered all my adolescent sides one by one. This had nothing to do with underestimating this stage. Perhaps I should say, “I established the areas of my life where I was stuck in the adolescent stage.”  Yes, this is what I was experiencing.  My consciousness had to experience this adolescent stage, because this period existed to prepare me for a mature stage. However, many of my attitudes were stuck there. I was lucky I had the chance to solve it. (Family constellation sessions create a trigger effect, and if you observe yourself successfully, then the rest is easy.)

As you can imagine, I was stuck in my approaches to sex and sexuality. When I observed myself, I met with a fourteen-year-old boy masturbating behind closed doors and trying not to be seen by his parents. Yes, my consciousness was at this stage. Of course, this boy has since grown up and had sex many times, but his consciousness never got to know about the real sex. Funny but this was what lay in my subconscious: “I’ve scored again. Yeah, I’m a real man. Look dad, I’m a man. I’ve grown up…”  It was an effort to prove my manhood. It’s like the more sex you have, the stronger you are. I must admit I didn’t feel well when I watched this scene during the session. It was hard to accept, very hard indeed.

I then realized many things during my interview with Cem Şen for this issue of The Wise. You will read it later, but let me summarize. Cem tells about chasing our desires and the stress of wanting to repeat the same experience after good sex. He then talks about our environments, pointing out that our brains are motivated by sex through the media especially. In short, he says there are more joyful energies than sex in the cosmos. I was shocked when I first heard this, but everything fell into place after a while.  I hope you will also benefit from this interview.

I feel now that something has started to change my perception of sexuality. I feel now like I was drawn to sex just because I wanted to experience it rather than because of a real need. It’s not to feel stronger or because my mind wants it. Yes, I’ve evolved on this matter. Moreover, I’ve started to experience the joy of other energies. I think I took a step toward understanding what Cem meant. This does not mean I will suppress my sexuality and commit myself to divine energies, because that would be hypocrisy. I just feel that there is another more satisfying universe before me, and I’m about to discover it. I’m merely at the beginning of this journey, and I will be sharing my experiences with you as I discover new things on this path.

Now, you can start your own journey by reading the articles in this issue. I hope my interview with Cem Şen will unlock many doors and trigger new experiences for you as well.

Enjoy the read!

Hasan Sonsuz