They say, “If a person is deprived of the love of their mother, they become wise or cruel.” Let’s explore together how our relationships with our mothers affect our lives, and how it can even change the world.
Your mother is the earth for that very special seed that embodies only you. No matter how strong that seed may be, if it is not sown into the earth, in time it will rot. Its transformation into a crop will only be possible if it reaches the earth.
Mother is water. Mother is food. Mother is a gift. Mother is life.
Father provides water. Father brings food. Father bears the gift. Father is the path to life.
The child learns this fact by experiencing it personally at the moment of impregnation. A child spends the first months of its life in water, swimming in nutrients and life and develops a lifelong unbreakable bond with the mother that can never be severed. Literally, it is dependent on her.
The child would not exist if the father did not put that seed in that earth at that moment. The potential for the child to reach life depends on the father. Once the seed falls into the earth, the father’s role in the child’s life will be excluded from its capacity of perception for a long time. Without seeing the father, without witnessing all he does, before drinking water from his hand, without experiencing a father’s caress on its head, the child will never be able to grasp the importance of the father. It would know it instinctively but unable to grasp it at the level of consciousness.
Whatever the mother has, she gives to the child from the first moment. For example, although she may be hungry herself, she would let the child consume her own resources. The mother’s teeth will become calcium for the infant’s bone, her flesh protein for its cells, the infant feeds itself, and the mother surrenders. The child takes from the mother in every case, while the mother gives to the child in every case.
At the moment of birth, a sphere of magenta-colored light emerges from the mother’s body, and as the mother takes the baby into her bosom, the sphere wraps around them both and connects the two vibrational systems together. At that moment, a lifelong bond between mother and child is formed.
The child, especially between birth and two years, will want their mother every moment. When the child wakes up and cries, the mother comes. When hungry and cries, the mother feeds her child. When unhappy, the mother caresses, kisses, and comforts her baby.
After two years, the baby begins step-by-step to develop individuality. Despite the unbreakable bond to the mother, now the child wanders away from the level of dependence on her. The child’s own identity and their personality begin to emerge and start to make individual decisions.
If the mother dies or abandons the child or for any compelling reason she is absent for more than 15 days during the first two years of life, the child, whether male or female, will, in the future, enter into a mental state called “early cut-off of orientation toward the mother.”
The baby will feel helpless, unprotected, and unloved. If no mother, neither is there a child. The child cries, grieves, wriggles, desperately beats itself up, so the mother will come; unfortunately, she does not come or maybe she cannot come. The child notices its greatest support in this new world, this support so familiar, is no longer there. The child is not cared for any longer—its doubts begin to turn into anxiety, anxiety into fears and fears into hopelessness.
In the end, since the child’s logic of mind is not yet sufficiently developed, it begins to believe that even their mother abandoned them, they can trust no one. All it knows about life is now stuck in the sentence, “Life cannot be trusted.”
Men especially get battered from the “early cut-off of orientation toward the mother” experience. The patriarchal world expects them to be strong. They are responsible for starting a family; they are responsible for the safety of their wives and children, for feeding, and of ensuring all their earthly needs and providing shelter for them.
Once a man becomes a husband and father, perhaps, he says to himself, “How strange, I do not even have a tree branch I can lean on, but I must cling to my own roots and be a support for all these people.” Internally, he searches for his mother who left him. He wants to prove himself to her, show her his success. Despite the fact that she abandoned him, he hopes internally for his mother to see and appreciate how he continued to live, how strong he became, and how he was able to become Adam.
The name Adam comes directly from the Torah, from the story of Creation in the Old Testament. “Adama” in Hebrew means “earth.” Adam was named personally by the Creative Source, meaning “coming from the earth.”
Throughout his life, Adam feeds himself from the earth and gets strengthened. After the day he ate the forbidden fruit, he ate and fed himself with everything that came from the earth. Before tasting the forbidden fruit, he did not have to think about food or spend labor; earth nourished him all by itself. It gave him whatever was necessary, just as it is true for the unborn baby during pregnancy and in the early years after birth. Earth was merciful. It was fertile and sustaining.
Then he ate from the fruit of the tree of knowing good and evil; his eyes were opened and so too his awareness. The first thing he became aware of was his nakedness. He found out that to eat the fruit, he needed to produce fruit. To get fruit, means effort. Fruit means hard work. Fruit requires care and dedication. To get fruit, it hurts a little bit. This is just what the infant coming out of the womb recognizes with the smack on its bottom: To get oxygen from the air, it needs to make a special effort.
The Creative Source saw the situation and said to Adam: “Since you chose the knowledge, from now on you will eat through the labor of your hand.” Adam was banished from the garden. The infant does the same as its ancestors. After coming out of the womb and as it grows up, it becomes able to hold a spoon. On the one hand, the mother continues to feed the baby, yet on the other hand, begins to teach the baby to feed itself.
In the end Adam learned to hunt, plow and raise animals. He had children and taught them the same. Just like the baby learning to hold a spoon to feed himself, many years later, he taught his own children to hold a spoon.
According to the Old Testament, Adam lived 930 years and had many experiences. He had a lot of children and transferred different information to each of them. As he learned, he passed down the information. He experienced countless encounters that he could only have lived in the state of knowing. Throughout his 930 years of living, Adam acted like a path of life. As he passed knowledge to his children, he took care of them without judging.
At the End of Success
The path of life has its own unique content. It moves the same way for everyone. Whether good and bad, smart or stupid, beautiful or ugly, honest or deceitful, honorable or dishonorable, all types of existence hold a special place on the path of life. As we walk along the path, we keep meeting with these same aspects. We decide ourselves what to do as we encounter them. The path does not interfere with us and our choices. Whatever our choice, it does not judge us.
When we make a decision, we usually use the energy coming from our roots as our reference point. Could this be because a person meets the energy coming from his roots for the first time while inside the womb? Or could it be because it meets the pain, grief, sadness, indecision, evil, discouragement, despair, aches, and everything we fear in life while still in the womb? We can never tell which is correct. We know that the infant considers the womb a shelter. When it realizes that there is no going back, it accepts the bosom in its place.
Just as Adam tried to satisfy the earth he came out of by making it more beautiful and fertile, the male human always struggles to please his mother. If his mother died or she has left him at an early age or for any other reason she led him to the “early cut-off of orientation toward the mother,” he feels helpless. When this feeling wraps all around him, to prove himself to his mother, he struggles to gain power and growth.
Man usually manages to get power and growth, but when he gets to the highest point and reaches out to his most important achievement, he loses everything. There are people who lose everything they had gained while still living and in their old age. You meet many people, who are most productive and make lucrative salaries in their middle ages, but encounter heavy diseases, separations, feelings of grief and mourning. We often see people who leave life altogether at a point when they had reached the best in their life. These are the kind of people I am talking about.
Let’s look together at the story of the Prophet Moses as an example of someone who exits life when at its best. As the story goes, Joseph, Moses’ ancestor, was separated from his motherland. Since his uterus [motherland] was so far away, Joseph became desperate to earn his living and life with his own hands. He uses his wisdom and achieves privilege in Egypt, both for him and his descendants.
The Jewish race had many privileges in Egypt, but in time lost their very special rights. In fact, according to the Torah, they fell into a situation that we now call slavery. For some reason (according to the Koran, the Creative Source had special plans for Moses), the pharaoh of the period chose to sacrifice the Jewish race to satisfy his need for atrocities. According to the story, he ordered the killing of all Jewish male children born in Egypt.
Moses’ mother, who was pregnant at the time of this happening, was concerned. She thought, “If my child is male, he will be killed.” While she was searching about what to do, she had a revelation to release her baby into the waters of the Nile but that she shouldn’t worry because his life would be guaranteed. Afterwards, the child was adopted by the Pharaoh’s daughter.
The Koran says that after his adoption, Moses refused to take milk from anybody. Accordingly, the news was sent in all directions, and women from different locations in the country applied to be wet nurse to the prince. The baby’s real mother participated in this call, and in the end, she became the designated wet nurse for her own son in the palace.
The time period of Moses’ separation from his mother to his reuniting with her is not known. It seems that it was sufficient enough for Moses to develop the mental state of “early cut-off of orientation toward the mother.”
Then Moses, (who according to some sources was educated as a Priest of Osiris) became a fair Prince of Egypt in his adult life. He was happy in the land he lived. He felt responsible for the order and harmony. One day while he tried to separate a man of Egyptian descent and a Jew, who were having an argument, he caused the death of the Egyptian. He was forced to leave the country when he learned a death warrant had been decreed on him.
Spiritually, just like the earth, a country is associated with the principle female of energy or with the mother. In other words, the descendants of Joseph are tied to the identity of Moses, once more separated from his own mother, his adoptive princess mother and Egypt, “the motherland” as he knows it.
As every man who suffered an “early cut-off of orientation toward the mother,” he was forced to leave all those he called mother, and he continued to search for his mother forever. Who knows how he must have felt to be separated from all his three mothers.
Wherever he went, he met with Tsipora. He found himself in the middle of an experience where he protected her and her sisters from the harassment of shepherds. He was raised as a fair prince, and he was always taught that he needed to be with the weak and to protect them. With his fair and courageous attitude, he won the girls’ hearts and gained the trust of their father. He asked for the hand of Tsipora and they were married.
I think from the perspective of Moses the new country never reached the position of “motherland.” In other words, it was no substitute for his mother. This new country, prosthesis in a sense, could only have substituted for his adoptive mother, the princess. This was very natural because Moses did not have any roots in this land that came out of these territories. It was the womb of other people’s mothers.
A period of time passed by and the Pharaoh died. Moses takes his wife and the others and returns to Egypt which he considered his “motherland.” He did not go to the palace, but, according to the Torah, he went beside his people who lost all their privileges and fell into slavery. He met up with his brothers, and he and his family settled with them.
After a while the Creative Source got in touch with him. I wonder if he had asked for this connection during his quest for his mother. This, we do not know. During his connection with the Creative Source, he was given the duty to take his “maternal people” out of those lands to the land of “milk and honey.” It was time for the descendants of Joseph, who was thrown into the well by his brothers, to return to the “motherland,” to the womb that brought them into the world. The Creative Source had designated a leader that could understand their pain and longing because he himself had been separated from his mother.
If he had not grown up motherless, would he have become like one of his people, who longed for their motherland but were unaware of their longing and had become property of the Pharaoh? Perhaps he would have said slavery is preferable to starvation, and the reunion would be left to another spring.
Man in Search of Their Mother
Although Moses was possibly looking for his mother, I do not think that he was consciously aware of this. Still, looking for his mother gave him a very important identity; his story turned from misery into a very significant mission.
When we look at the continuation of his story, his unconscious disappointment toward his mother is never finished. Perhaps while living great experiences during the forty years in the desert, all he desired was to prove himself to his mother. He would be able to prove himself and say to her: “If you had not left me, now you would be proud of my success.”
Actually, Moses proved himself to his mother, and according to the story in the Torah, his mother saw it. Although he may have proved himself to his mother, he never gave up his anger toward her for leaving him for whatever reason. He was never able to give her a place in his heart filled with love and respect. For this reason, although unaware, he was very angry with himself. Due to this anger he felt the need to punish both himself and his mother.
Despite all his sense of justice, Moses did some unjust acts during his experiences in the desert that prevented him from entering the “Promised Land.” Eventually he caused the Creative Source to say at the end: “You will go there, and you’ll see inside, but you will not enter.” He took his people there and told them, “Here’s your heritage; it is all yours.” Then he left and went away. According to the Old Testament, it is not known what happened to him after this point. In the Koran, it is written that during his Ascension, Prophet Muhammad saw him and even gave information about Moses’ external appearance.
As far as I understand, for Moses, the positivity in growing up motherless may have actually reached its purpose—he gained wisdom. He became so wise that, in spite of their impiousness, their distrust and even their ingratitude, he was able to embrace a whole population with willingness and love. All through many challenges, he was able to take anyone who was strong enough to the land of Joseph, the homeland of their ancestors. Along the way he trained them, gave advice and unconditionally provided all the support he could for them to allow their inner peace. Of course, Moses learned in later years the reason why his mother had abandoned him. Yet, another record had already entered his subconscious. Perhaps, the record already existed because of Joseph’s ancestors, and due to his mother’s action, it had manifested itself and had given Moses an inherent positive purpose. This is how he achieved wisdom. However, his wisdom did not work for him. After all, it is very difficult for a person to act objectively for himself.
As a result, Moses was disappointed, even angry, toward his mother who left him. At the other end of the same energy, self-accusation is highly probable: “Who knows what I have done that even my mother abandoned me.” That’s why, although he brought his people to the Promised Land, to Joseph’s motherland, he himself did not enter and remained outside the womb [so to speak]. The anger and sadness of being motherless had made him wise for others, but in fact, cruel to himself.
For Buddha, who partially, completely but definitively, positively influenced about 2.5 billion people around the world, Bert Hellinger said the following:
He was a sad boy whose mother died at birth. Throughout his life he tried to suppress his sorrow and struggled to reach inward and cleanse himself, and at the end, he was able to produce a huge philosophy of life.
According to what I see now, I cannot help but agree with him. In addition, these words coming from Hellinger formed on the basis of my thoughts in this paper. I thank him once again.
Buddha, just like Moses was able to become wise for his people and even for all humanity. But in his own life, he had left his wife and child, and by overwhelming them with great grief, he had in one way tortured his own family. In addition, the Great Creator had chosen him and sent him to the world as a prince in great wealth and opulence and having everything in the world. Buddha rejected his princedom and the abundance of his life and devoted his life to contemplation. He was not even aware that he was torturing himself while he was searching for the Creator in his meditations, the same Creator whom he had indirectly rebelled against by rejecting everything that had been bestowed upon him.
Creative energy is feminine, and of course, also related to the mother. Buddha was able to meet with his creative energy when searching for his mother. He remolded his pain with creativity, turned it into a great gift and then donated that gift to Mother Earth. In all probability, his feelings of guilt were caused by the death of his mother thus, he did not, he could not accept the gifts bestowed upon him at birth.
Wise Armies of Cruel Hitler
Adolf Hitler grew up motherless. His mother was there beside him, but due to the pain created by the loss of four children and living with a cruel husband, she was not able to give anything to her son. She was an unhappy woman. Her cruel husband was opposed to the wishes of one of the two surviving children, so he beat and tortured him which she could do nothing about.
Adolf was always a successful child in school. He wanted to become a painter; his father would not allow it. Apparently, his mother did not support his request either, so he never received their permission. According to the story, after the death of his father, he applied to the academy but was not accepted because his drawings were not good enough.
With my present day perspective and searching deeper into the subject, I understand that young Adolf struggled all of his life to please his mother, while at the same time trying to prove himself. I think that as the architect of so many murders, tyranny and pain, he was not able to mature to adulthood and continued to live like a child, who could not distinguish between good and evil. Perhaps for him, all those affected by his cruelty were no different than a cat—the way children enjoy themselves by attaching a can to a cat’s tail or cutting its whiskers.
Hitler’s steps in life were always about promotion. He served in the army and the National Socialist German Workers Party, and he was always very successful. When all this was not enough to please his mother (or so he thought), he devoted his life to purify his motherland from all those who were not like him. First, this started as a verbal act. He became wise enough to convince people when he talked of purification. As he became more convincing, he expanded more. He might have reached more supporters than even he could have thought initially.
Although born in Austria, Germany was the place he called motherland. It was a great representative of his mother’s womb in the outside world. He decided to leave only anything pure there, in that womb, and persuaded others to do so as well. He invoked a huge slaughter. He was throwing out of the uterus [so to speak, out of the land] all that did not carry his blood. There must have been a price to pay for dirtying his mother’s womb; therefore, he used numerous torture methods against the others.
When there were enough supporters, he began to believe that the territories of the motherland must grow. Now he was trying to grab lands from other countries, and in this context, from the wombs of their people, for himself and his supporters. He started wars—burned, destroyed and tortured. To purify, he used every known and newly-discovered way, without ever getting enough of it at all.
A child’s naive play to make his mother happy turned itself into the biggest story of the world’s worst atrocities. Of course, he worked very hard to achieve them. He studied diligently and became wise. He was a “wise-tyrant” in his own way.
I asked myself what was the positive purpose of his experience. One day, suddenly a light was turned on in my consciousness. His circumstances helped me to face all the aspects of this genocide and its consequences. The content and the consequences of such an act against humanity were clearly grabbed by the world-at-large, and a consensus was reached to say this should never happen again. The creation of wise armies was triggered by Cruel Hitler’s actions. Armies now continue to abide by the philosophy “To keep the peace; not to fight.” This is a change in consciousness.
A World with No Army
I hope that one day we may, as mankind, make the decision to create a world with no armies. Instead of holding this as only an intention, I decided to support it through effective internal cleansing. Its effectiveness lies in giving a place in my heart to everyone, so that they can at least experience the womb that they have always been longing for. Of course, I was not the first to think of a world with no armies. For example, in Costa Rica they have lived without an army for over 60 years. I hope this example will increase, and a day will come when the whole world will pass through life with no army and no guns.
I am aware that for the realization of such a desire, there must first be an understanding of the need for a new internal education and purification about the military, war, guns, and the economic growth that guns provide. Ancient knowledge says, “Outside is the mirror of the inside.” In this case, first it is necessary to purify myself from all vibrations, near and far, to and about anything related to armies. I must transform into love, large and small, all thoughts and memories of war, belonging to my own country, my ancestors or any other countries unknown to me.
I should erase the pains of war and transform them into the light of love; replace my fear of “getting hurt” with the idea that sharing is supportive and brings UNITY. I know this. I’m constantly working on this issue, I am purifying myself continuously, and I humbly give support and services to the purification of others.
Since each individual is only a mirror to others, even if one single human can be 100 percent purified about this issue, I am sure all the vibrations of war will be transformed into light.
To purify myself, I continuously use an affirmation that I created using a mixture of Ho’oponopono method and ZSG Deep Balancing Philosophy [the author’s own technique].
Above all, I say:
One Hundred percent YES to wars of all kind; I am allowed to [think about] all wars and I choose to always live in peace.
Then, I continue my affirmation with the following:
All the memories that I have been holding alive in my mind until now belonging to my ancestors and to all of humanity, memories of wars, won or lost, I apologize for forcing you to live with me in my mind until now; please forgive me, thank you, I love you.
Once I feel the energy start to evolve, I try to strengthen the effect and accelerate the transformation by creating a short visualization.
During my visualization, I picture the Creative Source’s pure golden light wrapping around and embracing the world. (Sometimes I do not see anything, but just think it is happening. Since I know the law says, “energy follows thought,” then the moment I think about it, I know it happens.)
Afterwards, I see the world being wrapped in this light; I see the same light penetrate rapidly into the world and reach into the layers of magma. All the while this is happening, I continue to purify and to transform and be transformed by saying:
I ask the pure light of the Creative Source to wash away within me, inside and outside of me, belonging to me, all that is about war, and to enter into all my cells, and invade them so as not to leave any space for anything else.
I think this works. Every day I see people around me who are more accepting of others, so I know my work is useful. So if you want to help me and help hasten the process as soon as possible to support establishing a world with no armies and to achieve peace around the world, do the work as I wrote above (re-programming the subconscious) exactly or according to your own methods.
Finally, honor the warrior men in search of their mother; you can strengthen your contributions to permanent peace in the world by using the Ho’oponopono affirmation and saying the following:
All those who grew up motherless and who thought they could stay alive only by fighting, I now see all of you. I honor the fate of every one of you with all my being. I apologize for holding you in my mind until now. Please forgive me, thank you, I love you.
On my behalf, I want you to know:
All of the memories alive in my mind about successful men growing up motherless, I now see you, and I honor your presence. I could only have written this article by maintaining your presence in my mind. I thank you for agreeing to stay within my mind as a memory all this time. Now it is time for you to transform into light and to be free. I apologize for not being able to set you free before, and I transform you into light with love. Please let the light within you unfold; join the light; be with light. Thank you, I love you.
So I say, and I conclude my article with love and light.
Zeynep Sevil Güven
The Wise Search
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