When it comes to people involved in personal development, esoteric, and mystical practices, it’s expected that they can keep their egos under control.
On the contrary, however, in such environments, we encounter people who consider themselves gifts to humanity. They ensure we mortals feel the difference between us. In short, these people have a bad manner. Such people use those who seek something. They take their time, energy, and perhaps even their money. (Some may even steal hearts.) They also shake their students’ confidence in personal development and spiritual matters. By all means, they’re mean.
We see numerous scandals in the news where someone has shown their true colors and been revealed. Yet we still want someone to lead the way. Perhaps it’s an unknown path, and people fear what’s ahead. Maybe they just want to learn through someone else, so they don’t have to struggle too much to learn everything a path has to offer. So, they find a divine person, such as sitting opposite a guru, and demand this person reveals the secrets, make prophecies, and explain how they can attract abundance into their lives, cleanse themselves from suffering, heal diseases, and rid themselves of their enemies. I suppose there isn’t even one person among us who hasn’t thought like this and wanted to get everything the easy way. This is exactly how we fall into the trap, though. Those who demand, but never once ask themselves the following questions, get what they ultimately deserve in the end:

  • Who am I that you’ll meet all my demands?
  • What can I do in return?
  • Let’s say I attracted abundance, power, and all manner of wonderful things into my life. Can I take responsibility for it all? Can I manage not to hurt people, always be fair, and not place myself on a pedestal?
  • Do I really want to know the truth? Can I handle it?

Those not asking these or similar questions assume that they deserve everything and everyone is their servant. They inevitably encounter spiritual narcissists, because they all exist on the same frequency…
How do we recognize spiritual narcissists?

  • In order to understand what it means to be a narcissist, the first step would be to consult psychological sources about narcissism.
  • The second step is to be wary about how that person is talking. Narcissists like to be at the center of the conversation. They make you feel that they know everything, while you are a mere rookie embarking on the path. They cannot handle criticism or even different ideas.
  • You must hold a mirror to yourself as well. Which narcissistic behaviors do you manifest? What do you reflect at others?
  • Spiritual narcissists are the most dangerous, because they do not reveal themselves as much as other narcissists. First of all, they are much more knowledgeable, and they can pretend to be humble and kind. For example, they would never curse and swear like other narcissists or insult or belittle people openly. Yet there are some behaviors that spiritual narcissists reveal themselves with.
  • As soon as the word “I” comes out of the mouth, it’s over. People shouldn’t introduce their egos into the conversation. They should act objectively without considering the benefits if they really want to help other people.
  • It is a signal if their personal lives contradict with their teachings, such as by cheating on a wife or girlfriend or managing friends and relatives to their own benefit. If they claim to be above the rules, there’s a red flag right there.
  • There may be nothing going well in their lives, yet they keep talking about life and the divine law of gravitation.
  • Be wary of someone not educated by an established school, someone who hasn’t dedicated years of life to the subject but still announces him or herself to be a guru, master, teacher, or life coach.
  • Some people claim you can understand whether a practice is authentic or not according to whether money changes hands. In my opinion, though, this is not a valid criterion. Even those offering something divine without charging a fee may end up demanding absolute obedience and respect in return.
  • Disregard for other religions, paths, schools, as well as discrimination and sexism, is another indication. Such a person is surely separated from wholeness…

Note: Spiritual narcissists should not be confused with people who love themselves. Masters have a great relationship with themselves, and it’s well known that people who do not love themselves cannot love others, and as a result they cannot help anyone. Naturally, all relationships with the self, other people, and the universe are all based on love. Such people may look after themselves, dress nicely, and enjoy the best quality of everything if they so desire, but this shouldn’t be confused with narcissism. Narcissism exists only in people who consider themselves superior to others, so they cannot connect with the universal or the divine. They only focus on themselves. You find many such people in business, medical, and legal environments. They can also be seen in the disciplines of psychology, religion, and philosophy. Talking about spiritual and divine topics doesn’t necessarily indicate that someone is a spiritual narcissist, but the potential harm that spiritual narcissists can cause is huge. This is why you should be careful when deciding which path to follow and which master to choose.

Arzu Pınar Demirel