Every soul will come, and with them a driver and a witness. (The Qaf Surah, 21)
Everyone has a purpose for existing. When mothers and fathers decide to have kids, it doesn’t mean they get to choose the child, quite the opposite. A child chooses his or her own parents when coming to life. The soul knows what kind of parents to pick, with it choosing the most convenient environment according to the Karmic Plan the soul must experience.
Forgetting their plan for incarnation as they grow up, children go through a process where they adapt to their environments. First of all, it’s their parents, and later the society and its laws. They get their initial education from their parents and later from schools, institutions, customs, and traditions, and all this shapes them. Children cannot therefore tell how much of what they know belongs to themselves or to the things around them.
These kids are afflicted by the sins of their parents, who in turn are afflicted by those of their parents…
This belief dates back to ancient times, but can it be changed? Of course it can, as long as we stop making the mistakes that have been imposed on us. What is needed is to evaluate both sides and look at this process from both perspectives.
For mothers and fathers, children are tools through which they experience the desires of their egos. They realize their own greed and other complexes through their children, and they even do it for the sake of love! This is because that child is their child, and they execute their instinct to possess and own the child. The child comes from their own blood, so they literally sacrifice themselves for that child. They make sure their children eat, study, and dress well, even though they don’t do these things themselves. They want their children to study and get good careers, because they don’t have one themselves. While they live in poverty through hard times, they want their children to live in luxury. They are shy, timid and cowardly, yet they ask their children to be brave, strong, and reckless. In short, they want their children to accomplish the things they never did. This is because they see themselves as the center of everything, so they come up with excuses and justifications for every behavior that they ask for. But why would a child do something that their parents didn’t do?
Look at the numerous bad examples they present. What did the parents really give to their children, and how could they expect to get anything back from them?
Eventually, we end up in an earthly fight and lose ourselves while we construct our made-up identity. We keep carrying these complex burdens. We strive to please our parents, even if we are reluctant to do so. We find ourselves in circumstances created by the choices we unwillingly made, choices in areas such as education, career, marriage, and children.
By trying to make others happy, we become the cause of our own unhappiness.
We start questioning once this identity, which we were forced to wear, starts to grow stronger. It hinders our actions and becomes an undeniable barrier in our way. The more burdens we receive, the stronger the scream inside us becomes. Is what is taught as happiness really happiness? Love is taught as something based on an exchange of personal interests, but is it really love? Who makes the choice? How does independence come into existence? Who does the life we live really belong to? In a nutshell, awakening starts once we start to understand that our identity doesn’t really exist. We start to question what we do and how we manage to live with constant inner unrest and chaos. We ask why our inner voice contradicts what we live in life. This is the “awakening,” and this is followed by the “pursuit.”
The soul incarnates in order to experience the innate information it holds, yet it is drawn far away from its essence when it enters the rule of the material world. The soul essentially remembers what it must do, but realizing this may be delayed due to what it lives through. There is no good or bad, because it’s all about the universal principle of duality. Whatever seems negative to us on Earth can help us to remember our soul and get closer to it.
In my article last issue, I highlighted the importance of disciplining the “Ego” in the esoteric teachings. Our identity, which is formed during childhood, is our social side. Of course, the influence of our instincts feeds it as well. It is more important for there to be no need to look for someone or something to blame. As one Zen Master said, “No one can do anything to you unless you let them do. If someone has, then it means you have allowed it.” So, looking for someone to blame will only delay your journey. The greatest benefit that pursuit brings is the chance for us to transform. You cannot erase your past, but you can transform it, and this is only possible through reason, will, and information. If we can see our mistakes as a way to learn, we may even be thankful for the unpleasant events in our lives.
After all, Pursuit is
The key to awakening,
The precondition of spiritual maturation,
The relationship of duality,
The request to reveal wisdom,
Pursuit is the soul’s voice…

Nimet Erenler Gülkökü