You feel like something is scooping out your stomach. Sometimes that pain strikes right through your heart, and you know those days very well. Sometimes it feels like you’re being pulled apart limb by limb. But the most difficult one to bear is when you burn to ashes in flames. You know all these things all too well, as I do.
I admire your courage, though, for not running away at times like these and numbing yourself with drugs, alcohol, or meaningless sex, choosing instead to stay in that pain. You know deep inside that this suffering must pass. Every deception you assume to be true and every illusion you suppose is real must be burned down. You know this, and that’s exactly why you allow yourself to suffer!
It’s because you have burned up before, many times in fact! It hurt so much, just like it does now, as if your guts are being ripped out. Sometimes this fire lasts more than a day, but you know it will pass sooner or later. You’ve seen that only truth, essence, and what really exists can remain. I call it diamond, while you call it light. Wrapped up in deceptions that you supposed to be true: What was actually burned up was merely that, the you that you believed to be you. When you wake up the next morning, all that’s left is what I call diamond and you call light. It is a light under the blue skies as bright as the warm sun, something you’ve always waited for, the radiance that you always longed for…
That’s why you allow yourself to suffer and burn. You stay put, no matter how much it hurts, although you think it’s you that’s hurting…
Dear soul, if on reading these lines you realize you are suffering relentlessly, know that you are not alone. This one here burns up, too. But hallelujah! This will surely pass, and you will be left with the brilliant truth. All it takes is to stay put in the fire. Don’t postpone it! Don’t deny it! Don’t try to numb it! Don’t escape it!
