About Helping…

There is a common saying that I like: “No help should make the one who gives it feel haughty nor the one who receives it aggrieved.”

Human nature has the tendency to receive love through giving, but love is not a currency, and it cannot be counted.

We need to learn that whatever we give, we must feel like offering it and voluntarily give it, appreciating that no one owes us love.

Therefore, if you give support to others, they must certainly want it from you. It does not hurt to offer help, but you can only offer it three times. The system does not allow you to offer more. If they do not want it, forcing support on someone and entering their zone against their will is just cruel.

Unwanted help creates a sort of debit/credit relationship in the giver. Even if you don’t realize this, you’ll issue an invoice for the payoff.

This expectation will damage both the person you helped and supported, who could even be a family member, and your relationships with other people.

Worst still is how it will destroy your relationship with yourself.

There is a saying: “Do well fishing and throw it back into the sea. If the fish don’t know it, God will.” Likewise, there may be those who forget all the help and support you gave.

There may be people who neglect the help and support they ask from you, and they may even show ingratitude rather than gratitude in a twist of human nature.

You did it all without expectation, though, a voluntary gesture just because you felt like doing it.

Therefore, you can look at yourself in the mirror and feel respect, because no one owes you any love for the support and help you gave, including yourself.