Many of the indulgences we partake of in life can actually give telling hints about our personalities.

For instance, you can see someone’s general relationship with life by observing how they eat. If you consciously watch someone’s entire course of eating—such as how they act when they are hungry, the amount of food they consume, the bites they take into their mouth, and the way they chew—you can learn a great deal about the person in front of you.

Similarly, the way we approach our partner, the amount of time we dedicate for foreplay, the location we choose to have sex in, the positions we prefer, and our behavior after having an orgasm all clearly demonstrate our relationships with life and other people. Whether or not we have the courage to get intimate with each other through sexual intercourse is again determined by our attitudes and behaviors within that relationship. What’s more, in addition to the physical closeness, how much more are we able to open ourselves up in other ways, both emotionally and spiritually?

Our bodies act automatically as soon as we open ourselves up. Tense muscles and an insistence on certain positions indicate how inflexible we are in life. Men and woman who want to dominate life and prove their power over it may place their entire bodyweight on their partners. Couples who wish to share their souls will embrace each other firmly in a genuine way, and this is a devoutness for embracing and sharing life and the universe. People who prefer to have sex in the dark, under the covers, or when half asleep, meanwhile, are strictly bound within social opinions, social norms, and taboos. In contrast, those who frequently make eye contact and dare to delve deeply into their partner’s eyes are ready to break the chains of the ego. Those that feel a need to hide their faces and their expressions through darkness or a turning of the head could be burying potent memories under the burden of embarrassment.

When partners reach an orgasm simultaneously, they realize the unique feeling of becoming a part of the other, of uniting and becoming one.

The period after orgasm is the time for tranquility, to relax and unwind. Hurrying out of bed, turning your back, falling asleep, or immediately moving onto some other task can disrupt the powerful healing effects that can arise in this period. Sometimes even a conversation can ruin the moment. Just caressing each other kindly and gently, looking into each other’s eyes, touching each other’s face and neck, and whispering each other’s names can yield a feeling of safety and abundance, and this is a treatment in itself.

By letting go of all our unhealthy characteristics, which over time have become our identity, we can increase the degree of pleasure we derive from sex. By improving the feeling of love and being loved, we can live spirited relationships. Once we are in the flow, once we escape from all thoughts and prejudices and overcome ourselves, and once we successfully transform the misinformation and negative beliefs, we will see how our sex lives get better.